


Samurai's Delight

by Crest87



Category: Gintama, S.T.A.L.K.E.R. (Video Games)
Genre: Adventure, Angst, Comedy, Crossover, Eyepatch/Gasmask, F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-17
Updated: 2019-03-17
Packaged: 2019-11-21 10:51:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,226
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18141251
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Crest87/pseuds/Crest87
Summary: A romance/comedy crossover story of Gintama and S.T.A.L.K.E.R. featuring the relationship between Kyuubei and a stalker named Viktor.





	1. Good morning Kyuu-chan.

     It is a seemingly regular everyday morning in the Yagyuu estate. Kyuubei is casually going back and forth getting herself prepared for another day of instructing students in the art of the sword. It still is quite early and she will be alone for at least half an hour, but Kyuubei wanted to get some warm-up. Besides, she wanted to keep her nigh immaculate record of punctuality, she has only been late two times in her life as a disciple, a ridiculously small number for almost all people, but not for the Yagyuu heiress. Back then, she was severely punished by her father, a memory she'd rather let go of.

_Well, I'm not a little kid anymore, but he still can reprimand me in front of everyone._

Making sure that her gi and hakama are properly worn, Kyuubei was finally ready to make her distinctively professional appearance.

_Damn, I skipped breakfast._

Just before pulling the sliding rice-paper door open, she pulled her ponytail back tight and took a deep calming breath.

''Good morni-''

Her greeting cut short, Kyuubei stood for what seemed like an eternity in front of the dojo entrance. The familiar Yagyuu family dojo with its shiny floorboards, neatly organized bokken racks and wooden elegant sign with their motto overhead was now an utterly alien place. Just in front of her feet the floor seemed to blur and flicker in and out of existence, to the left side the bokken rack was on fire but the rack and the bamboo swords it held were still in a seemingly pristine condition. Dead center, the flooring material along with the mats were clumped together in a huge, floating amorphous mass that writhed and twisted in itself, the bare ground beneath it pulsating like a living heart. To the far right end, lay an ominous black void that bellowed cold air and debris.

_Uhhh...am I still sleeping?_

After what amounted to about five full minutes, Kyuubei broke her gaze off the nightmarish room, stepped back and closed the door. Closing her eye, she pinched the bridge of her nose and burst out laughing.

_I really should follow Tae's advice and get some vacation...Well, after today I'll ask father for a week or so._

Her composure regained, she opened the sliding door again, only to be confronted by the same bizarre spectacle.

_Okay...fine. The dojo has become a twisted hellhole. No need to get stressed about that._

Twenty minutes later, Kyuubei is in her father's room walking back and forth with a phone in hand trying to convey needlessly convoluted details about the dojo's condition to Yorozuya. As she speaks, her hand goes over her hair and nape, frustration and panic obviously taking their grip.

''Alright, fine. We'll be waiting.''

She closed the fancy flip-phone she held and turned to her father that sat in his usual position in anticipation. His expression definitely showed concern but not as much as she would expect. He had his own brief breakdown, but given what he put Kyuubei through in the name of the Yagyuu family, she figured that he would be far more worried about their family business and prestige.

''Did you call off the sessions fath-um, papa?''

Koshinori nodded.

''Yes, all training sessions are off for at least a week. I take it your acquaintances at Yorozuya shall investigate the matter Kyuubei?''

His daughter absentmindedly fidgeted with the phone she still held in her hand and took a seat in front of him.

''No. They are currently occupied in an assignment at the other end of the country chasing a robotic chicken.''

Koshinori opened his mouth to speak but anticipating what he would say, Kyuubei held up her hand.

''Don't ask, I didn't myself.''

''Alright...But what about that chaos at the-''

''They said that they would send someone who owes them a favor. He will be over tomorrow. ''

''Oh. I'm not sure if that is reassuring to be honest.''

Kyuubei took a sip from the tea cup in front of her before replying.

''Strangely, Gintoki said that weird cases just like this are his specialty, so we can only hope.''

With this, the day was practically over for everyone at the Yagyuu compound, the dojo's access was haphazardly closed off to prevent unpleasant incidents and all occupants and personnel instructed to steer clear of that building altogether. Kyuubei herself had an early bath and dinner, the raw bizarreness of the day obviously having taken a toll on her. She decided it would be best if she hit the futon and face the next day with a clearer head. Just before lying down a thought crossed her mind.

_Wait...where's Toujou? I haven't seen him all day. Eh, he's probably out picking clothes for me again, no cause for alarm yet._

Her head met the pillow and had just one more short thought before the embrace of sleep.

_I wonder what the Yorozuya's contact is like._

The next morning Kyuubei was up at her usual time out of habit and a little bit out of anxiety over what would become of the dojo. After breakfast, she put on her blue kimono and white coat outfit instead of her gi and hakama. She was expecting their problem solver today, and as the Yagyuu heiress she had to look sharp in front of commoners.

_Heh, commoners. How many times have I been aided by and had fun with commoners? Yet I still put on all those pretentious airs and postures._

No more than an hour of waiting with a tea cup keeping her company, a maid came to inform her that the Yorozuya's assistant had arrived.

_Finally._

She hastily set off for the courtyard, all the while mentally preparing herself for her introduction and possible information she might be required to give about the building. Emerging out of the main hall, she ultimately spotted the imposing form of the visitor who was apparently admiring the arch of the compound's gate. Her single eye widened.

_What in heaven's name is he wearing?_

Hearing her footsteps the stranger turned to her allowing her to fully inspect his rather peculiar appearance. His physique must definitely be well built, though it is obviously enhanced by the hulking suit of armor he is wearing. The design is reminiscent of the military armor usually worn by foreigners, though it seems to be highly personalized. A pistol rests in a holster at his hip and a peculiar long firearm on his back along with various other tools and knick-knacks hanging from the suit. When Kyuubei turned her attention to his face, her gaze was returned by the two tinted eyepieces of his gas-mask.

_Alright...He surely seems like something the Yorozuya would pick up._

Upon taking a look at her himself, the masked visitor took a step forward and extended a gloved hand as he voiced his greeting with a heavy accent.

''Viktor Polyakov, pleased to meet you madame.''

Kyuubei promptly froze up at his gesture. She wan't unfamiliar with the customs of foreigners, but she did have an issue with physical contact when it came to men thanks to her father's and grandfather's enforced conditioning. Noticing her hesitation the stranger retracted his hand and gave an awkward laugh.

''Uh, sorry, force of habit, I forgot that you do bows and not handshakes here, I-''

Kyubei held up her hands in a reassuring motion.

''Oh, no! That's not the matter, I just have a hang-up about touching, I mean you no offence of course.''

Viktor didn't seem to think much about it and shrugged in a laid back manner.

''No offense taken, uh...''

The Yagyuu almost facepalmed at her momentary social ineptness.

''Um, Kyuubei. Yagyuu Kyuubei.''

''Pleased to meet you miss Yagyuu.''

Having no other ways to gauge his emotion, she made note of the reservedness in the timbre of his voice and body posture. He surely did not seem like your run of the mill odd job worker, but he did not have the air of a professional warrior either.

''Um, forgive me if the question appears insulting Sir Polyakov, but what exactly is your specialty? I mean the closest thing to your job description?''

The man looked at her with what may be genuine wonder behind his mask.

''Oh? I thought the Yorozuya told you. Well miss Yagyuu, I am a stalker.''


	2. Good work, Stalker.

   Kyuubei's single eye blinked several times, her face frozen in astonishment and true wonder.

''A...stalker...you say?''

Viktor nodded without breaking his gaze on her.

''Exactly.''

The Yagyuu woman took a cautious step back and raised her hands in a gesture that betrayed a mixture of bewilderment and disbelief.

''You just admit it like that? Have you no shame? No honor?''

''Uh...''

Kyuubei scoffed, turning her head to the side.

''But of course...Makes perfect sense that you would be an associate of Yorozuya. ''

''I'm sorry, I should have clarif-''

Kyubei turned around and threw her hands up in the air.

''It was awful enough to have a depraved ninja and that gorilla man, now we have a stalker with military gear... So who is the object of your unwanted affection Sir Viktor? Otae? Kagura? Tsukki-I mean Tsukuyo-donno?''

''Um...''

A few minutes and a flustered explanation by Viktor later, Kyuubei was walking towards the dojo along with the stalker. Her palm rested on her face which had acquired a redder hue.

''My... deepest apologies Sir Viktor, I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions like this.''

''It is really not a problem Miss Yagyuu. I should have specified the meaning of the term.''

The samurai gave out an awkward giggle.

''Well, even though it is not your fault that the word has an entirely different meaning where you come from, I suppose you could have taken a small precaution.''

Viktor chuckled at her observation himself.

''True.''

Upon arrival at the dojo's entrance Viktor halted and gave the building a good look from roof to foundation. After a few (apparently) thoughtful seconds he turned his gaze to Kyuubei.

''Have you closed off all the other possible access points to the building?''

His tone was even and calm.

''Yes, and everyone has been given orders not to approach.''

The stalker nodded as he started checking some of the devices he carried and his respirator's filters, Kyubei observed the bizarre foreigner's routine.

''Those...anomalies, you call them? Must be stressful, to dive into a space where the laws of nature betray you. ''

Viktor paused and seemed to contemplate that for a second.

''It is. To be honest, in some occasions I was scared out of my mind... But it is my choice. Not the best of my life I'm sure, but at least it pays well, hah. Besides, this one will be a piece of cake, nothing like the conditions where I'm from.''

He made a final check on his visor and turned to Kyuubei.

''I will be going in now. Sorry, I will have to enter with my boots on, it's a safety measure as you understand. I will return as soon as I have a general idea of the situation.''

Kyuubei nodded almost absentmindedly and watched him walk down the corridor with a peculiar beeping device in his hand, his steps more careful and measured.

_Huh. He does look like he knows what he's doing._

The Yagyuu princess stood still for a few moments, beginning to idly walk about the front of the dojo's entrance soon after.

_It would be interesting to learn more about Viktor's line of work. On a theoretical level of course._

Stretching, she turned her back to the dojo. Still no sign of the stalker.

_Or what he looks like under all that gear. On an inquisitorial level, of course. I mean, why would he wear-_

''Miss Yagyuu? ''

''Eh?!''

Kyuubei jumped in her geta and snapped back to the dojo entrance, the way the stalker's muffled voice came from.

_How does he move quietly while dressed like a juggernaut?!_

''Sorry, didn't mean to startle you.''

''No matter, do you have anything Sir Viktor?''

The stalker shoved his scanning device back into a pouch on his vest and nodded reassuringly, almost giving the impression of smiling under his mask.

''Yes. Follow me, if you please, it's perfectly safe up to a point.''

''Alright.''

She followed him down the corridor a few steps behind him, opting to keep her footwear on herself, just in case. Viktor stopped just before the training room, opened the door and pointed at a spot just a few steps before the blur on the floor.

''Up to here it is safe to set foot in. Keep more distance though, my readings are accurate, but better safe than sorry. Besides, I only wanted to give you an overview before attempting to solve anything.''

The one-eyed samurai simply stood and gave him her full attention, eager to learn more. Waving a hand towards the bizarre room, the stalker began.

''One good thing about this is that none of the anomalies occurring here are emitting radiation, even locally. Another is that they do not seem to be of the expanding or moving types, excluding external forces, their zone of activity is static.''

Kyuubei listened with great interest, but did not ask anything yet.

''Now, about the specifics...See that sword rack that's on fire? We call that a Burner. As you already get, it emits flame and heat. Anything living or metal will burst into a torrent of fire. Not in perpetual harmless fire like the rack and the surrounding area, mind you. Actual ignition.''

He pointed to the pulsating clump of floorboards and mats.

''That's called Vortex. This anomaly is gravitational in nature, it pulls matter towards it and compresses it in a tight lump. I wasn't sure at first since it seems dormant, but luckily it is near the end of its life cycle.''

Kyuubei narrowed her eye at that, she definitely wanted to ask about anomaly life cycles later. The stalker finally pointed at the blurring floor in front of them, nonchalantly.

''And that's just a minor optical anomaly, it is perfectly harmless, it just prevents light from functioning as it should.''

''I see...And, what can we do about them?''

''That's the good thing. These particular anomalies actually have an expiry date, and a short one at that. The two big ones will stop functioning in about a week, maximum. That minor optical on the floor will take a couple days longer, maybe. We can't speed up the process, but at least we can safely wait it out. I can secure the altered matter generated by those anomalies when they expire and even arrange a buyer if you are interested.''

The Yagyuu heiress shot a glance towards the room, hand on her chin, obviously processing the new information.

''Hmm...What about that void to the right?''

''Uh, yes. I was going to get to that...See, that's a spacial anomaly. It opens like a rift between two points in space and effectively teleports anything and anyone that passes through. It could lead to any place on the planet, I can't know where and unfortunately it will not expire on its own without external force or energy. That's why I will need to contact some scientist partners of mine before engaging this problem.''

''Will this take additional time?''

''Unfortunately yes, I will also have to look into why anomalies appeared here in the first place. This downtime won't be charged of course.''

Kyuubei's expression was set between frustration and disappointment, something which went noticed by Viktor much to his discomfort. Her sighing deeply before responding certainly did not help.

''Alright Sir Viktor, please do keep me updated.''

''Uh...M-my apologies if I seem unhelpful. I just have a policy of informing my client of the situation before taking any action. I will secure your building, that is for certain!''

The swordswoman didn't expect such an externally imposing person to act so genuinely flustered, she found it both surprising and amusing, in a way. Amusing enough to not suppress her snicker.

''There is no need to worry Sir Viktor! It's true, I am discontent with the state of the dojo, but you are not to blame. Even if it's just information, you have been most helpful. Please do keep up your work.''

Hearing her encouragement and noticing her confident, as well as endearing smile, the stalker breathed a sigh of relief.

''Thank you Miss Yagyuu. I'll do my best.''

Upon saying this, Viktor unconsciously put a reassuring hand on the swordswoman's shoulder. It was just a light, friendly pat. Just. A. Pat. Kyubei's man-touch reflex kicked in and before she even realized it, she had flipped around and judo thrown the stalker across the room. And into the gaping void to the far right.

''FUCK THE WHAAAAT!'' Was the only thing poor Viktor had time to yell out before disappearing into the black hole leaving only a blurring afterimage for a few seconds. Then nothing.

Kyuubei was still panting and trembling for a few moments from her sudden surge of adrenaline. Shortly after, her shoulders dropped and her mouth hanged open, as she realized what she had done.

_He...he went? Fuck...fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, I shouldn't have, I shouldn't have...I should have kept control, control! Where is he now? He said it could lead anywhere, what if it kills him? How do I get him back? How, how, how?_

She made an uneasy step forward and almost fell over due to her anxiety. She slapped herself on both cheeks and shook her head.

_It's my fault. I shouldn't have left my issue unchecked all this time. If he ended up in whatever hellhole, it's my fault. I have to bring him back. My responsibility, my honor._

Still obviously shaken by the incident she made a dash for the gaping hole in existence, skillfully avoiding the edges of the other unnatural phenomena around her. Raising her arms in front of her face, she leapt in. The next thing her senses register is darkness followed by a flash of light.


	3. welcome to the Zone.

     Kyuubei felt her body become weightless, she was either floating in a sea of light or losing consciousness. Without a warning sign the blinding flash subsided abruptly, and she felt the pull of gravity once again. In a split second the samurai woman impacted the earth with a hearty thump before beginning to roll involuntarily, thanks to her previous momentum. After a few painful meters she finally stopped, courtesy of a solid obstacle she could not currently identify. Groaning, Kyuubei unsteadily lifted her face off of the cold dirt and shook her head to get her bangs out of her eye. Her right side, the one that hit the obstacle and impromptu brake, ached horribly. Instinctively, she turned to the right, finally noticing a pair of legs clad in padded fatigues and armored combat boots.

''You...You actually followed?!''

Raising her gaze upward, her single brown eye met the stalker's gas mask eyepieces once again. her mouth gaped in a mix of shock and relief.

''Sir Polyakov! You're alright!''

''What were you think-...Well, yes. What about you? Are you okay?''

''I think so...''

''That's good...''

His voice betrayed his uneasy demeanor, but Kyubei didn't pay much mind at the moment. She flexed and moved about a bit, nothing seemed to be broken, just a few bruised ribs. The landscape around her caught her eye for a moment. Very sparse woodland, it looked bleak and quiet. The stalker's muffled voice caught her attention again before she had time to make any more observations.

''Uh, I'd help you up but...You know...''

Kyuubei's mind quickly snapped back to the reason this mishap began. She instantly dropped to a prostrating position, her nose nearly touching the ground.

''I'M SORRY! I'M SO SORRY! IT'S ALL MY FAULT!''

Viktor was completely taken aback by the samurai princess's lightning apology. He looked around in embarrassment and knelt close to Kyuubei.

''Miss Yagyuu, that's not important right now.''

Her shoulders twitched and she did not raise her head.

''But, but I threw you into that void! It's my fault that we are in-''

A look of realization came over the swordswoman's face.

_Where are we?_

She slowly lifted her head off the ground and looked around her once more. Tall, mostly unhealthy trees scattered left and right with their sparse formations broken by patches of flat, marshy land. Few cracked roads and forsaken buildings were the only signs of civilization existing at any point. The sky above looked almost strangely clear with a few crows flying in circles above the marshes. Wearing an expression of utter bewilderment, Kyuubei slowly turned her head back to Viktor. The stalker took a step back and awkwardly spread his hands as if presenting an art exhibit.

''Welcome to the Zone Miss Yagyuu.''

Kyuubei just stared at him with the same look of confusion for a few moments.

''Z-Zone?''

''Yes. The Zone of Alienation more officially.''

Kyuubei had obviously next to no familiarity with the concept.

''It is the place that effectively spawned my profession. Those phenomena you witnessed back at your dojo? The Zone gave birth to the original occurrences.''

''The Zone...The land itself does that? How?''

Viktor shot a few glances around them.

''I'll explain to you some time later. For now we must move to a more secure position.''

''Secure?''

''Yes. This area is one of the quieter ones, but it's still not safe to stand around.''

The samurai got herself up and dusted off.

''Um, alright...Where are we going?''

'' Given that this space-time anomaly was a one way one, somewhere where we can arrange for an extraction route. No aircraft is going to pick us up from here. ''

He opened his backpack and pulled out a single filter half-face gas mask.

''Here, put this on. We'll take a safe path, but the ambient radiation can still be a problem.''

''Radiation?!''

''Yes...I'll explain that one later too. Don't worry though, if you take some precautions, you will likely suffer no permanent harm.''

Kyuubei winced at that and looked at the mask with curiosity.

''Do...Do you wear this too?''

''Seldom, it's one of my back ups. Don't worry, I always clean it with alcohol before storing it.''

''Thank you Sir Viktor.''

She took the mask in her hands and looked it over before attempting to put it on. With partial success.

''Uh, that strap goes around the back of your head. The other one clasps behind your neck. Pull them tight.''

''R-right.''

Not being able to give more hands-on help with the mask due to to her touch issue made assisting her awkward, but Viktor couldn't help but find the sight of Kyubei trying to put it on amusing.

''There, how's this?''

Finally, she put it on properly. Absentminded, Viktor put his gloved hand on the filter's intake and pressed firmly. He regretted his action instantly as Kyuubei tensed and he mentally braced himself for a judo throw. It never came, much to his surprise. Perhaps her sensory alarm goes off with more direct contact?

''Uh, Sir V-Viktor? C-can't breathe in...''

''Right, yes. That means your mask seals properly.''

''Oh. Thank you.''

The stalker took a PDA in his hand and switched a couple of screens back and forth.

''Here's Yanov station... And here's the bunker...A bit far, but we can make it by evening.''

He put the device back in a pouch, then unslung his carbine and chambered a cartridge.

''Alright, let's get going. Keep close to me, trace my steps if you can and do not touch anything without asking me, even if- especially if it looks innocuous.''

''Alright.''

''Don't worry, explanations will come a plenty.''

The duo began walking down a decayed asphalt path that the stalker singled out. In the short distance an old warehouse complex stood out, seemingly abandoned. To the far right lay a marsh, the stench of its bacteria infested water would be flattening even at this distance, if they didn't have their respirators.

''This may not be the fastest route, but it's still a relatively quick one. Thanks to recent events, a lot safer too.''

The eye-patched girl nodded, still expecting more banter from the stalker.

''We turn right here, and in a while we'll reach a scientific mobile base, I have some acquaintances there. We can both arrange for an extraction and ask if they have any idea why your house became an anomaly showcase.''

''I see...''

The strange foreigner started looking much more reliable to Kyuubei now. She will have him compensated for all the trouble once back home. Her thoughts were cut abruptly when she nearly bumped on the stalker's back.

_Why did we stop?_

Viktor stood still and looked intently at the sky.

''Fuck me, tell me that it's not-''

His monologue was interrupted by the static of the radio in his pouch, a short warning in his native tongue came through it a second after. Viktor swiftly turned to Kyuubei, almost reaching for her shoulder.

''To the warehouse. Now.''

''W-What? Why?''

''No time. Get moving, pronto.''

Less than a minute into their dash for the building, a rumble not unlike thunder came from above. A few seconds later, the sky began turning dark red.

_What is going on?_

Closing in to the warehouse entrance, Kyuubei's head started throbbing rhythmically, almost in tune with the rumble far above them. She said nothing, though her strained expression showed it.

''Keep going, we're almost there!''

Passing the warehouse loading bay and navigating the labyrinth of empty metal containers, the duo entered the main office building. Only when they both reached the center of the ground floor did Viktor raise his hand, signaling that they could stop. Panting much like his companion, he took a glance at the ceiling above them.

''I think-I think we're good, let's wait here.''

With the sky still roaring and bleeding red light down at the earth, the stalker and the samurai princess sat down on the rough floor. With the sun now obscured by that nightmarish phenomenon and with no working lighting inside, the interior was lighted only by the random red flashes from outside. Kyuubei still had her gas mask on and looked at Viktor intently, almost pleadingly. He had noticed.

''Right...This...This is an emission, a blowout. They are storms of energy, the type that fries your nervous system and brain. They happen at random, apparently. If you want to avoid the worst you need to put as much concrete and metal between you and the blowout as possible.''

The Yagyuu woman said nothing and turned her gaze at the floor in front of her. Shortly, she buried her face in her hands and broke down in silent sobs. Viktor expected distress by her at some point, but nothing so sudden.

''Uh, Yagyuu?''

He dropped the honorific in his surprise at her reaction, not that Kyuubei payed any mind.

''Fucked up...I fucked up.''

This was the first time Viktor heard her break her formal speech pattern and even swear.

''What is the matter?''

''I fucked up. We're in this hellhole because I fucked up. I overreacted once again and ended up putting us both in...in this.''

Viktor thought over his reply for a moment, so as not to appear patronizing nor indifferent. He certainly was not the most socially adept person himself.

''Well, technically we're here because of your uh, unorthodox maneuver, but you did warn me about your touch issue when we first met.''

Kyuubei smiled in self pity at that.

''That's a nice rationalization Sir Viktor. I mean it. But that's what it only is. A sugarcoating. I have been aware of my issue since my early teenage years. I have known how inconvenient and even dangerous it can be. You did not. And I practically did nothing to at least try to get over it, I kept going with my life like I was the only one being inconvenienced...Too self-absorbed with other... Now meaningless things.''

Feeling the atmosphere heavier, Viktor went for a more open approach in the hopes of finding a chance to soothe her.

''How did you end up with this issue of yours anyways?''

Her eye darkened and she kept silent for several seconds.

''It's...It's a long story. Not now, sorry.''

He could have been more tactful.

''That's alright.''

The emission outside seemed to be subsiding. Kyuubei looked at the slowly fading red flashes with a blank expression.

''Why are you not angry with me Sir Polyakov?''

Viktor paused his own blow-out gazing session and turned to look at her in the eye.

''I...am a bit angry, subconsciously at least. But like I said, it's not like you wanted this to happen. Besides, this is where I have operated as a stalker for many years, this danger isn't something new for me.''

He was not entirely honest with his reasoning and he knew that. He let it go anyways, Kyuubei did not seem to have anything to add in her depressed state. The emission had ended by now, moving again took priority.

''Alright, the blow-out's done. Let's get back on the road miss Yagyuu.''

The swordswoman nodded and got to her feet, ready to follow Viktor who was already up and facing the exit. Embarrassingly, she wanted to ask if there was someplace she could urinate before venturing out, but didn't get to it. Deafening gunfire pierced her ears and before her mind registered what happened she was in a guard stance with her katana in her hands.

''Vikt-!''

The stalker in front of her motioned to be silent while still holding his pistol with his dominant hand, a few empty casings littering the floor around him. There, at the doorway lay a vaguely humanoid figure, bleeding.

_Did he just..._

His weapon's sights went all over the entryway, seeking more foes. Viktor himself hoped for none. After a bit he lowered his weapon and turned to the sword wielding Yagyuu woman behind him. Excellent readiness, he liked that.

''Seems like it was just one.''

''What was?!''

''You will probably not like this.''

He started walking up to the body, gesturing for Kyuubei to follow. Reluctantly she did, with her sword lowered but still unsheathed. Getting closer she quickly realized that what Viktor had killed was humanoid in shape only. It was tall as a human with a wiry, thin build covered by completely bare, rough skin that had a few bullet wounds on the chest area. The most alarming features apart from its clawed appendages were the barbed tentacles hanging from its disgustingly humanoid skull. Blank white eyes were set in sunken eye sockets, staring into nothing. Taking a few steps back the Yagyuu heir slowly turned to Viktor, wide eyed and with at a complete loss for words.

''Wh-what in...''

Her companion shrugged awkwardly, looking down at the creature.

''Yeah...I'm going to have to explain a lot about the Zone's fauna on the way.''

Much to his surprise, Kyuubei calmly sheathed her blade and gave out what sounded like a low, hysterical giggle.

''Can...Can I ask something?''

''Uh yes, sure.''

''Where can I pee around here?''

''W-well...''

This will be a long and fun trip, that's for sure.


End file.
